guided imagery and dr. appointments

As recommended by one of my friends who is a psychologist and has had her own struggles with IF, I ordered two guided imagery CDs this week geared toward IF (and one IF yoga DVD that she didn't mention but that I ordered anyway from the same website).  The CDs and DVD arrived yesterday.  I wasted no time uploading the CDs onto my iPod and I plan to try out the yoga DVD this weekend when it's too hot to go outside.  I am trying as many things as possible to help us get pregnant (without over doing it); I don't want to go through another BFN and look back and say 'I could have done this or I could have done that.'

I was exhausted yesterday from having to wake up extra early and make a 6-hour round trip for DH's aunt's funeral.  Funerals are draining anyway, and I've had a really hard time with them since my mother's funeral 7 years ago.  She passed away at the age of 56 after an 11 month battle with breast cancer.  I haven't wanted to go to another funeral since - it just brings up too many sad memories (queue tears) - but there are times when it's just unavoidable.

As sad as it was that DH's aunt passed away, her health had been declining in the last month or so, so everyone had time to prepare.  She was 70.  Her husband is still living, but they never had any children so he is pretty lonely now.  She had also been in the US Air Force; it was quite a moving funeral with all of the tributes paid to her by her fellow women and men in arms.  But I couldn't help but wonder why they never had any children.  Did she struggle with IF like me?

Anyway, after being so exhausted, I got ready for bed around 9:30 pm and brought my iPod with me so I could try out this whole guided imagery thing.  It was wonderful!  I have listened to it two days in a row now (different tracks each day) and I feel so relaxed.  My main source of stress is my job, barely beating out our IF treatments, so I'll try anything to help me relax.  It'll take some practice for me to get into the visualization part of the CDs, but just listening to the calming music and soothing voices was all it took.  I wasn't awake but I wasn't asleep as I listened; the best way I can describe it is that I must have been in some kind of zen-like meditative state.  I never thought I'd be the type of person to meditate and really get into it but I loved it.  : )

I'll let you know how the yoga goes this weekend - that is if my giant growing follicles let me do any kind of exercising.  If you are interested in the CDs or DVD, they can be found here on the Health Journeys website.  I ordered the Fertility Pack, which includes Help with Fertility, Meditations for a Fertile Soul, and Fertility Yoga.  It took about 3 days for it to arrive at my home address via standard shipping.

Oh, and btw, I had another Dr. appointment this morning.  Thankfully, I was not hit on in the elevator today but I did see another female inmate being escorted into the hospital.  This must be the hospital that the prison uses.  It's not a big deal, it was just surprising to see in everyday life.

Also, I asked my nurse if there was anyone else available to do my blood draw today.  I explained how much it has hurt and how much my arm has bled each time the tech has drawn my blood.  I was proud of myself for speaking up.  The nurse spoke with the tech and the tech used a smaller 'butterfly' needle instead of whatever she was using.  It did hurt but not as bad and it only bled a little.  I still think it's her technique rather than me being a whimp since I've never had consistent pain and bleeding in my arm after a blood draw.  Once in a while, yes, it has happened.  But not 5 times in a row.

I had my second acupuncture treatment today too.  My chiropractor added a few more needles on my legs and left off the two on my neck so I ended up with about 20 pokes again.  I had the same pregnant nurse but it was less awkward (at least for me).  My chiro also recommended DH and I take kelp minerals to help with IF so I stopped by the Whole Foods Market across the street from my chiro's office to pick some up.  I was about to go to the register to pay when I read the label on the bottle; it said something about how it may contain 'carcinogens and reproductive toxicants.'  I put it back on the shelf and walked out.  Maybe there is a brand out there that doesn't have this risk; I'll have to ask my chiro about it when I go back again on Monday.  If not, I won't be taking kelp any time soon.